How I Got Here

A while back, I worked with an Insight Life Coach to level up my photography business. That powerful experience showed that it was time to act on my desire to serve people in a new and exciting way. I joined the Insight Coaching Community, founded by John Strasse, whose core guiding principle is to “turn up empty,” trusting that everyone knows the answers to important questions. My life experience and lengthy self-development path have given me the humility and compassion to serve with responsibility and consistency.

Find your own insights

I show up curious, believing that deep down, we all know what is best for us. By asking powerful questions and listening carefully I help my clients uncover their own insights and exciting possibilities. Together, we gain vital clarity to pursue a life that is more fun and dynamic. I prefer to coach people, not problems, because I believe that when we tap into what we truly want, it can dissolve even the most stubborn challenges. 

Slow down to speed up

I have been trained to slow down, enquire and witness, giving people time to think deeply. By slowing down the conversation, not interrupting and reflecting back I help my clients discover what they may not have articulated clearly before. I’m often surprised by the wisdom that people express, especially during tough times. Slowing down to consider aspects of one’s life can save a lot of time and energy wasted by rushing into things or ignoring the elephant in the living room.

Reflecting and challenging

I reflect back what I hear and challenge my clients on their self-limiting stories, believing that the most valuable insights and breakthroughs lie within us. I look out for contradictions, changes in vocal tone, noticeable body language or revealing choices of words to reflect back to my clients, helping them see themselves from a new perspactive.

Checking in with the body

I believe our bodies can tell us a lot, and ignoring sensations that are linked to thoughts and emotions can cause all sorts of problems. I believe that paying attention and deeply experiencing tension stored in the body can clear blockages that hold us back from thriving. This can be done in a simple, non-interventional way, by just feeling sensations that have been avoided or ignored. Feeling numb, tense or nervous are signs that something is going on inside that may need to be expressed.

Move from victim to owner

Even the most successful people can display victim mentality, for example the may say, “I always have to help everyone but they never support me”. By busting and naming the victim parts of ourselves, it is possible to externalise these thoughts and beliefs, instead of holding them as part of ourselves. As an analogy I refer to this sort of thinking as running software that doesn’t do what we intend it to do. Apps that hinder our progress are viruses, trogon horsed and bugs in the system. “I always draw the short straw”, “life is tough”, “I have to get through the day” and “I was born unlucky” are phrases some of my clients have used as excuses to not own their power to achieve or get what they want in life. An OWNER learns from mistakes, makes the best of what they have and meets challenges “all-in”.

Being the CEO of my life

Although we acknowledge and respect the painful things like regret, loss, neglect or failure, it may be time to put certain things to one side and consider what we really want. The big question is whether we are in charge of our minds. Am I in charge or are my thoughts and feelings? Many people have survived awful hardships and not allowed their pain to ruin their lives, and have gone on to do great things. It can be surprisingly useful to clearly list values and principals in order of importance. Are negative emotions and overthinking more important than love and happiness in your life?

This isn’t therapy

Although deep conversations can raise one’s frequency and be therapeutic, I do not offer psychotherapy, nor do I analyse or diagnose. That is the job of a therapist, but I can work alongside trained practitioners. If I I am out of my depth I will suggest finding a someone trained to deal with deeper problems, addiction or psychiatric issues. I am here to focus on life-improving possibilities, one of which may be discovered to be psychotherapy.

Parts of us

There many parts of a person, like a computer has various programmes, however the operating system is the real ME who witnesses and directs all processes. Often different parts of our character have different needs or conflicting values. Some of these “characters” need to be kept in check and others given more power. Naming a part of oneself that sabotages business deals by talking too much could be named “Chatterbox Barry” to get familiar that this aspect and nip the behaviour in the bud. Similarly establishing a new alter ego that does great deals by listening to clients and empathising with their needs could be named “Generous Sue”. Having an alter ego is a great way to tune in to a mode of being that makes one affective in an important situation. For example, why allow an envious part of one’s personality come into play when forming a relationship when you can identify and name that sabotaging behaviour?

Taking the step

Making a commitment to coaching is a powerful step towards actually doing what makes us happy and fulfilled. As an Insight Coach I’m here to help trade in problems of the past for a future you love. If you or someone you know would like a mindset boost, I may be able to help. I offer 1hr online sessions on Google Meet.

Some words from my clients

“The experience of being in conversation with Dimitri really allowed a few things which had been sitting under the surface, to surface and be verbalized. His gentle prompts and questioning acted as a clear mirror. The session, although an hour long, has reverberated through the weeks following and the essence that has remained is courage.” Amy Rusch, Cape Town

“I had a very helpful coaching session with Dimitri. He got me to link two current plans I have, which I had not seen as connected. By doing this, I was able to look at each plan with a fresh perspective. He also encouraged me to think in more depth and detail than I had done to date. I realised both during and subsequently that more reflection on these plans will help me save time, make better decisions and achieve more. I am very grateful for Dimitri’s assistance to help me achieve all of this.” Jonathan Kemp, London UK

“Dimitri is able to listen well and deeply to the core of the problem without becoming heavy because he knows hoot ask the right questions.” Alwien Turner, Netherlands

“Dimitri has a calming demeanor, inviting presence and profound understanding of the human condition. By gently challenging me to ask certain questions, he helped me separate the wheat from the chaff, and connect more deeply with my true self. ” Jaque Hau, Cape Town

“Dimitri is a wonderful guide, he takes his time and leads you to your destination. For me clarity was the help.” Steve Custins, Granada, Spain

“Struggling with anxiety and depression, I went back to the same negative narrative for so long that it became my normal. Dimitri helped me find ways to catch myself in the moment and change it to a NEW positive narrative.”

I spent a very special hour with Dimitri Otis in deep and meaningfull conversation in the realm of being a subject of a Life coaching session. I was made aware of some recurring emotional issues in self reflectance that was of great help to me.” Lambro Tsilliyiannis, Cape Town

“Much needed clarity gained, Dimitri does not beat about the bush. It was an intelligent talk, sorting important things out in my mind.”

“Am thankful that the Dimitri helped me realise how, as an artist, my creative chaos can be in balance with order and harmony.” Barbara van Ittersum, Netheralnds

“Dimitri has a calming demeanor, inviting presence and profound understanding of the human condition. By gently challenging me to ask certain questions, he helped me separate the wheat from the chaff, and connect more deeply with my true self.” Sonette Swanepoel, Eastern Cape

“Dimitri coached me in a very profound way. He picked up subtle energies, he listened deep, had insightful questions and brought a loving, calm energy. In this way I felt really seen and safe to open up fully to vulnerable places. I could explore my thoughts and blockages, and I got more space to and clarity how to become more myself.” Bregje Bressers, Netherlands

“ had a life coaching session with Dimi. I found it to be a compelling way to take a look at my life. Together we explored various aspects that were important to me. We set goals and discovered stumbling blocks. We looked at challenges. He encouraged me to look a little deeper. I tried to find what was in my heart and soul. He really "got" me. I felt a connection to my deeper self emerging. I sensed that I would find a way forward with more clarity. I took away to be more to the point in my day to day actions. I learned that I need to be more authentic and heart driven to change my life. I feel grateful for this new perspective and reframing. I would recommend Dimi to anyone searching for new answers and direction.” Heidi Inge Wies, Cape Town 

“Your coaching really helped to bring back a certain confidence in myself and all the abilities that I possess but sometimes fail to see because, I am busy focusing on the noise from outside and inside myself. It opened my mind to many great possibilities and it also showed me that I am my own limitation. I’ll recommend your services to anyone and I’ll also like to remind everyone that self doubt is real mostly because of the things we tell ourselves based on social norms. You can move beyond your limitations and make it to the highest level. Thank you very much Dimitri.” Ayram Stevens, Accra, Ghana

“I recently attended one of Dimitri’s sessions with an open mind and a dash of skepticism. But, wow! His expert guidance transformed my jumbled thoughts into crystal-clear clarity. Who knew talking to someone who actually listens could be so therapeutic? Dimitri's warm and wisdom-filled approach made our conversation feel like a refreshing coffee date (minus the caffeine jitters). If you're ready to untangle your thoughts and find direction, Dimitri's your guy. Highly recommended!” Jo Roets, Cape Town

“The coaching call I had with Dimitri was very pleasant! Dimitri has a serene, sincere and peacefull energy and listens with all his attention! He gives space and room for all your thoughts and feelings and helps you to look at them. His questions gave me new insights about my patterns and why I do the things I do. This helped me a lot! I would definitely recommend Dimitri as a coach, he is what you need when you want to come further in your personal growth process!” Marcella Amst, Netherlands

20 Minute snapshots of books worth reading (link below)

“In this series I share a few of my favorite Big Ideas from Philosophers Notes. Each episode is a super quick look at a great optimal living book. Hope you enjoy!.” - Brian Johnson

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLj3yWdMwimwmSz4DXwtJkCeQ958RHnOfj

Positive Intelligence

Shirzad Chamine reveals how to achieve one's true potential for both professional success and personal fulfillment.  His groundbreaking research exposes ten well-disguised mental Saboteurs.  Nearly 95 percent of the executives in his Stanford lectures conclude that these Saboteurs cause "significant harm" to achieving their full potential.  With Positive Intelligence, you can learn the secret to defeating these internal foes.  Positive Intelligence (PQ) measures the percentage of time your mind is serving you as opposed to sabotaging you.  While your IQ and EQ (emotional intelligence) contribute to your maximum potential, it is your PQ that determines how much of that potential you actually achieve.   The great news is that you can improve your PQ significantly in as little as 21 days.  With higher PQ, teams and professionals ranging from leaders to salespeople perform 30-35 percent better on average.  Importantly, they also report being far happier and less stressed.   The breakthrough tools and techniques in this book have been refined over years of coaching hundreds of CEOs and their executive teams.  Shirzad tells many of their remarkable stories, showing you how you too can take concrete steps to unleash the vast, untapped powers of your mind.  DISCOVER HOW TO: * Identify and conquer your top mental Saboteurs. Common Saboteurs include the Judge, Controller, Victim, Avoider, and Pleaser.  * Measure the Positive Intelligence score (PQ) for yourself or your team--see how close you come to the critical tipping point required for peak performance.* Increase PQ dramatically in as little as 21 days.* Develop new brain "muscles," and access 5 untapped powers with energizing mental "power games."* Apply PQ tools and techniques to increase both performance and fulfillment.  Applications include team building, mastering workload, working with "difficult" people, improving work/life balance, reducing stress, and selling and persuading.

How to get the most out of coaching

One-on-one coaching can transform both your career and personal life. Whether you want to be successful at work, deepen your relationships with the people who matter most, or break free from unproductive patterns, working with a coach can help you create the future you've always wanted. That being said, coaching isn't magic. All too often, people have the desire to improve but fail to achieve the exponential growth they deserve. It isn't because their goals are unattainable or that they aren't getting the right support from their coach; it's due to a lack of basic understanding in how to get the most out of coaching. Simple tips and tricks can make a world of difference. Over the past decade, highly sought coaches Karen Davis and Alex Mill have partnered with a wide range of clients, from successful entrepreneurs and Fortune 100 executives to individuals simply looking for more peace and balance in a hectic world. They've seen people surpass all of their goals and expectations while others took longer than they should have to make any real progress. In this book, Davis and Mill present a straightforward guide to ensure that you get the highest possible ROI from your one-on-one coaching relationship. You'll learn to drive the most value from your sessions, easily carve out time to take action, and effectively assess your progress and course correct—if needed. This book will shift your perception of coaching, enabling you to attain greater personal fulfillment and immediate life-changing results.

Six Pillars of Self-Esteem

Six Pillars of Self-Esteem is the culmination of a lifetime of clinical practice and study, hailed as the most significant work on the topic. Immense in scope and vision and filled with insight into human motivation and behavior, it is essential reading for anyone with a personal or professional interest in self-esteem. Dr. Nathaniel Branden introduces the six pillars—six action-based practices for daily living that provide the foundation for self-esteem—and explores the central importance of self-esteem in five areas: the workplace, parenting, education, psychotherapy, and the culture at large. Six Pillars of Self-Esteem provides concrete guidelines for teachers, parents, managers, and therapists who are responsible for developing the self-esteem of others. And it shows why—in today’s chaotic and competitive world—self-esteem is fundamental to our personal and professional power.

Imperfectionism Is Freedom

Perfectionism is a naturally limiting mindset. For example, kids are taught to color inside the lines, and any color outside the lines is considered a mistake that must be corrected. Imperfectionism frees us to live outside the lines, where possibilities are infinite, mistakes are allowed, and self-judgment is minimal. While the freedom from imperfectionism is impactful, it does not preclude us from having problems. Imperfectionists aren’t so ironic as to have perfect lives, they’re just happier, healthier, and more productive at doing what matters. If that sounds good to you, take the first step into imperfectionism and start readingHow To Be An Imperfectionistright now!

Change Your Questions, Change Your Life

Questions are at the core of how we listen, behave, think, and relate--as individuals and organizations. Virtually everything we think and do is generated by questions. Questions push us into new territories. The future begins with our thinking, represented by the questions we ask ourselves. The book shows readers how to consistently choose the questions that can lead them to success, both personally and professionally. This technique, called ""QuestionsThinking,"" stimulates innovation, accelerate productivity, and create more rewarding relationships. "Change Your Questions, Change Your Life" is a personal growth fable that tells how a seasoned executive, Ben Knight, uses QuestionThinking to move into a higher leadership role and how the same methods of change help him and his wife, Grace, enrich their marriage.